Sunday, June 3, 2012 sux.

Quiet Sunday at home with my 4, and my 5 nieces and nephews. I decided to check out some movies online that my kids might enjoy.

The week before we saw Avengers on Mother's Day, my family and I watched all the superhero films that were in the movie: Captain America, Thor, Iron Man 1 and 2, but left out the Hulk, because Mark Ruffalo.

The reason we got to see the Avengers on Mother's Day.
Anyways, the kids did really well sitting through all 4 of those movies AND The Avengers, so I tempted fate by trying to increase the streak. I have been having an itch to rewatch the X-Men movies, and finally watch Wolverine's movie. Cue Netflix.

Netflix doesn't have ANY of them. I checked Hulu AND Amazon streaming, and neither do they. WTF?

Here's where we get back to Netflix sucking.

Instead of having any of the original X-Men trilogy, X-Men: First Class, or X-Men Origins: Wolverine, THIS is what greeted me as the "Newest Arrivals"

Go ahead and take all of that awesomeness in for a second........

They don't stream ANY of the 5 X-Men movies......but Honey 2 is "Most Popular" today. The direct-to-DVD movie. The fucking street dancing movie. At least the first one had Jessica Alba in a tight top so guys had something to stare at while the horrible story unfolded.

Oh, and by the way, they recently added Urban Cowboy, because fuck Wolverine, that's why. And what do we have next to Urban Cowboy? Baby Boy, a movie about an unemployed BICYCLE MECHANIC living in Los Angeles. The movie has Tyrese and Snoop Dogg, who, you will be shocked to learn, was not nominated for an Oscar for his performance. Shocking. And next to that 50 Cent? What the hell is 50 Cent doing in a movie? With Ray Liotta and Mario Van Peebles? oh....wait a second. 50 Cent wrote the fucking movie? Ugh.

And let's not forget the Gary Shandling obligitory pile of trash in the upper right hand corner. Mind you, these 5 were the only movies that I picked on. There were more.

Here's where it gets interesting.
Here are the review scores for these movies from
Honey 2 - 5% of critics liked the movie, 45% of audience 
Urban Cowboy - a respectable 77% for both critics and audience......but it's still over 30 years old.
Baby Boy - A surprising 71% for critics, 85% for I'm really shocked.
All Things Fall Apart - No critic rating, 49% for audience.

X-Men: First Class - 87% critics, 88% audience

Granted, some of the X-Men movies are lower than Baby Boy, but come on. Then I got to poking around and there are NO superhero movies on Netflix, except for Superman 2 and Iron Man. No Batman, no Spider-Man, no Hulk. 

Get your heads out of your asses Netflix. I know the whole Qwikster thing lost you a ton of cash, as it well should have, but pull some better negotiations for licensing, so we can watch Wolverine instead of Leprechaun 74: Leprechaun in Da Nursing Home.

No comments:

Post a Comment