FFS FRIDAY!!

We live in an overly litigious society. My mother is a legal professional, and has been the head of various paralegal/legal secretary organizations. Being overly litigious is directly proportional to not having my parents live in my garage. I love litigation. I would sue myself to keep my parents out of my garage.

So, imagine my surprise when I find the following:

Gino Romano
v.
Kim Kardashian; Diana Taurasi; Steve Nash; Khloe Kardashian
6/20/2012 2:12 cv 1320 Snow


Preliminary injunction lawsuit for a temporary restraining order where plaintiff caught defendants Kim Kardashian and Diana Taurasi "lesbian kissing and having oral sex with each other in public" at Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport, and Kardashian injecting steroids into Taurasi's arm "because she needed to cheat on her WNBA game debut." When plaintiff confronted the two, Kardashian "took an entire Sbarro pizza and mugged" plaintiff's face with it and Taurasi poured hot sauce down plaintiff's pants. When plaintiff went into the bathroom, he caught defendant Khloe Kardashian "giving Steve Nash oral sex," and Nash smashed a toilet plunger on plaintiff's head.

Pro se

After doing some digging, I found that "Gino Romano" is an alias for Jonathan Lee Riches, who we'll get right
back to.....

(PS - Pro se means "representing himself" as I'm sure any lawyer would say "You, sir, are batshit crazy.")

If you don't know who Diana Taurasi is, she's a professional women's basketball player who plays for the Phoenix Mercury, and is kind of a local celebrity.

Go ahead, make a H-O-R-S-E joke. She dares you.

Anyways, the docket description of this case is enough to make your head explode "Scanners" style, but after a little internet digging, Mr. Riches is FAMOUS for filing lawsuits JUST. LIKE. THIS. Here is a list of cases from one website that are tagged with his name. He sued the Ghostbusters. I'll give you a second to read that last sentence again.

He sued Michael Vick for $63 BILLION, alleging that

"Vick stole two mixed pitbull dogs from the plaintiff, used the dogs in several dog fights, and

then sold them on eBay and used the proceeds to buy missles from the Iranian government." 

Better than that.....check out the complaint filed in FEDERAL court. Complete with his name copyrighted......and at the bottom "Due to RESTRICTIONS WITH TYPEWRITERS, this suit was handwritten". How fucking dangerous to yourself do you have to be to have restrictions from typewriters?!? FFS.