WWW Wednesday!

Sorry I haven't been posting, but as I explained on my Facebook page, I was busy helping the elderly, saving the rainforests, building strong infrastructures for third world countries, tutoring children with learning disabilities, out charity-ing Oprah (is that even a word?), and running the latest anti-establishmentarianism (oh yeah, I used it) campaign, #OccupyAwesomeness.

Anyways, today's www.Wednesday link I believe I have used here before, but I like it so much. The site is called Rap Genius. Here's the concept:

Take a rap song.

Analyze lyrics. 

Explain rap song to intellectuals.

Be awesome.

For fun, I took a rap song that we all should know, Sugar Hill Gang's "Rapper's Delight". Here are some of the explanations of the lyrics:

Lyric - "See I am Wonder Mike and I'd like to say "hello"

To the black, to the white, the red and the brown, the purple and yelloW"

Explanation: "Wonder Mike implies no racial barriers to the enjoyment of his music, including Grimace, Barney the Dinosaur, or Prince"

Lyric - "I got a color TV so I can see

The Knicks play basketball"

Explanation - "Back in the day (1979), having a color TV was pretty common in American households. But they were nothing compared to what they are now. They didn’t come in 20 different sizes & in multiple types (digital, LCD, plasma, LED, 3D) and color quality wasn’t great. There were no video games (at least that you could play on your TV like Xbox and PlayStation) for us to play for hours on end. There wasn’t 300 channels of mostly shit and there was no choice of TV providers out of a list of hundreds. Back then, the only thing that was on was the news, sport games, and a few cartoons (part of the reason why kids in the 70s spent most of their time outside).

They looked like this:

If he was to say that line today, i would probably go like this:

…I got an HDTV so I can see…"

How about a newer song? 50 Cent's In Da Club, you say? 

Lyric: "If you watch how I move you'll mistake me for a player o r pimp
Been hit with a few shells but I don't walk with a limp"

Explanation - "50’s been shot a few times, but he still carries himself like a well-sexed man — he does not limp (not surprising since he got shot in the head)

What’s strange is that a “pimp walk” often involves a limp or at least the illusion of a limp; counter-intuitive, no?"

 

Lyric -"If the niggas hate then let them hate and watch the  money pile up"
Or we can go upside your head with a bottle of bub'"

Explanation - "So, if they hate you have two options:

1. Let them hate, and watch the money pile up
2. Hit them in the head with a champagne bottle

The choice between these two, of course, was a common source of disagreement between Martin Luther King and Malcolm X

"

 

As you can see, you can probably waste a good couple of hours laughing at some of the explanations derived from these lyrics. Sucks for your boss, but good for your soul.

 

Enjoy!

The 3 Things...

So, for Thursday's posts in the month of October (to prepare for National Novel Writing Month, I'm writing a post a day, remember?) I thought it would be interesting to narrow down a broad topic to three things. For instance, this week will be:

The 3 things...I would go back in time and tell my High School self.

#1. You are a freckled white kid. Act like it.

So, yes, I listened to gangsta rap growing up, and I wore clothing that could have accommodated me and 3 of my closest friends, what's the problem in that? 

Yes, I thought I was a "player", I "dated" a lot of "girls". But, in reality I was really a "dumbass". I had a 1984 Chevy Cavalier with the driver's side bumper crumpled from an accident.....but that didn't stop me. I threw some wheels on that bitch! I had a sound system that was most likely stolen from someone else, and thought that by playing my music loud, I was gaining respect.

What I realize looking back is that my neighbors were just pissed because nobody wants to hear that shit at decibel levels that will drown out the sobs of thier mid-life crisis. Plus, I'm half deaf now. Oh, and the player thing? Yeah, that was just dumb. 

#2. Save your money in an interest-bearing account and for God's sake, buy Google when it goes to IPO.

I had a full time job my junior and senior year of high school, and I saved absolutely zero. I spent my wages on cigarettes (because smoking is cool.......right??), beer (underage is the best tasting beer EVAR!), and tricking out my pimp ride (see above). I never thought about my life after high school, or beyond. If I had saved some money, and thrown it into Google.......let's just say I wouldn't have to write a blog to try to make people laugh. I would pay people to do that.

And I would do this.....constantly.

#3. Meet as many people as you can.

I was, and still am (to a point), an extreme introvert. Growing up, I had the same circle of friends from 7th grade to 5 years out of high school. I never thought that I needed anyone else. However, through my career, and connections through family and other friends, I have met people that are almost as awesome as I am. 

The life experience each person carries is interesting to me. I like knowing people, what they do, and why they do it. I'm thankful for every one of you that has become my friend, either through this blog, or in real life. You have all made my life better.

Except this guy. He's a giant douchebag.......just kidding, Chris.