The 3 Things....About Digital Stalking

From my post yesterday, I got to thinking about the breadth of information that we can find on the internet, if we know where to look.

1) Digital stalking is an artform.

I used to be in charge of sales representatives. Our jobs were to get in front of decision makers of companies and cultivate a relationship that would make them choose my company over a competitor. The information age has made this INFINITELY easier. Doing a few searches, I found marital status, children's names/ages, birthplace, hobbies/interests, and other little nuances of their personality that could win us a contract. The information we got was harmless, but if a stranger walked up to you and started talking about things you were interested in, related to your marital status, and brought up a few great restaurants in your hometown, it would put you at greater ease than someone bull rushing you with a business proposal.

The result of doing "homework" on a client.

2) Stalking is the new parental control


When I ask my kids about school, I get the same response, without fail, day in and day out.

Me: How'd school go guys?

Kids: Good.

Me: What did you do?

Kids: Nothing. 

As much as I'd love to believe that they stared at the walls and went all Stepford Wives at school, I know that's a lie. Then they ask to go to birthday parties and hang out with friends that they've never mentioned before. When we ask about the friends, the response we get is "They're nice."

That's great. I'm glad you think they're nice. Now, let's check their Facebook pictures. Oh look, he's smoking a cigarette. Here's another one of him kicking a kitten. Oh, look, he's throwing up a gang sign. Sure you can go over there.....to say that you are not allowed to ever talk to him again. I'll wait in the car.

6th graders sure have evolved.

3) It is a double-edged sword.

When I get a new friend on Facebook, I make sure to go through their photos to see what their life is like since I've seen them last. I also from time to time, search for people in my past life that I haven't heard from in a while, or antagonists that have helped shape me into what I am today. 

The problem with that is that you may not like what you find. The guy I got in trouble with for shoplifting? He's now a priest. Not even a "business suit on Sunday, dress shirt and jeans weekdays" pastor, he's a full out "robes DAILY" pastor. This is typical of some of the personal transformations you'll find. Life is funny that way. Some people blossom late, some people find their calling, some people run their lives into the ground. You may find friends that were just like you are now drug riddled criminals, while the girl that you picked on is now a supermodel. Good luck.

Remember the girl that you called "Thunder Rolls" because she was fat, and liked Garth Brooks? Apparently she still likes country music.

The 3 Things...

So, for Thursday's posts in the month of October (to prepare for National Novel Writing Month, I'm writing a post a day, remember?) I thought it would be interesting to narrow down a broad topic to three things. For instance, this week will be:

The 3 things...I would go back in time and tell my High School self.

#1. You are a freckled white kid. Act like it.

So, yes, I listened to gangsta rap growing up, and I wore clothing that could have accommodated me and 3 of my closest friends, what's the problem in that? 

Yes, I thought I was a "player", I "dated" a lot of "girls". But, in reality I was really a "dumbass". I had a 1984 Chevy Cavalier with the driver's side bumper crumpled from an accident.....but that didn't stop me. I threw some wheels on that bitch! I had a sound system that was most likely stolen from someone else, and thought that by playing my music loud, I was gaining respect.

What I realize looking back is that my neighbors were just pissed because nobody wants to hear that shit at decibel levels that will drown out the sobs of thier mid-life crisis. Plus, I'm half deaf now. Oh, and the player thing? Yeah, that was just dumb. 

#2. Save your money in an interest-bearing account and for God's sake, buy Google when it goes to IPO.

I had a full time job my junior and senior year of high school, and I saved absolutely zero. I spent my wages on cigarettes (because smoking is cool.......right??), beer (underage is the best tasting beer EVAR!), and tricking out my pimp ride (see above). I never thought about my life after high school, or beyond. If I had saved some money, and thrown it into Google.......let's just say I wouldn't have to write a blog to try to make people laugh. I would pay people to do that.

And I would do this.....constantly.

#3. Meet as many people as you can.

I was, and still am (to a point), an extreme introvert. Growing up, I had the same circle of friends from 7th grade to 5 years out of high school. I never thought that I needed anyone else. However, through my career, and connections through family and other friends, I have met people that are almost as awesome as I am. 

The life experience each person carries is interesting to me. I like knowing people, what they do, and why they do it. I'm thankful for every one of you that has become my friend, either through this blog, or in real life. You have all made my life better.

Except this guy. He's a giant douchebag.......just kidding, Chris.